I sit in my daughters empty room, shirt soaked with tears and face covered in mascara. I didn't know this would happen or I would have worn waterproof. I boxed up all her beautiful gowns and blankets all monogramed ready for her to wear and I just have to ask.. Why?
Lord, I know that you know best...your word tells me so..
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28.
I know you can Love her much more than I could ever dream of loving her. But why couldn't you just love her from heaven? Couldn't you just watch her from above instead of watching me fall apart? Couldn't you just give her to me for a little while? I ask why, why, why like a child. I know why.. But I ask anyways.
You gave me her for only 9 months to show me how precious life is, because I took it for granted. You let me carry her to move mountains in my life that otherwise would still be standing. You lent her to me because You loved me that much! No matter how we raise our children were not guaranteed they will enter Your kingdom, Thank you Lord for saving her. I know she is with you! But could you please just read her fairy tales and show her the flamingos? Please tell her we miss her and that we will be there soon!
As a young adult I always overheard older seasoned Christians saying come Lord come, and I thought.. No you crazy people hush don't say that I'm not ready. Let me get married I want to have kids and see them graduate. I want to live on this earth for a little longer. Please don't rush the Lords coming.
Welp here I go... Come Lord come now come quickly! I'm ready to see your face! You have prepared and seasoned me you have taken my hard arrogant heart and broken it to pieces and caused me to love like I have never loved before! For once in my life I have pure joy even as I sit in my daughters empty room and wonder what happened. I have peace that I want to be contagious. God of Wonders beyond our galaxy you are Holy!! Only You could take this girl... Who lost her beloved little girl and make something beautiful out of it! For you reading this... I'm praying for you. I pray you can see and feel my brokenness but also see Gods love and feel his presence, I pray this brings you to your knees in prayer. Maybe you haven't lost a child but just lost yourself in addiction... Jesus Saves!! Freedoms calling chains are falling!! God can make all things new!!! I'm praying for you!
Peace love & Flamingos..
